Supporting Someone Affected by the Wildfires: What to Say, Do, and Avoid
Supporting Someone Affected by the Wildfires: What to Say, Do, and Avoid
The recent wildfires in California have devastated lives, homes, and entire communities. If someone you know has been impacted, you may feel unsure of how to help. Providing support can make a difference, but it’s important to approach the situation with empathy and care. Here’s how to be there for someone who is dealing with the aftermath of the fires.
What to Say
“I’m so sorry you’re going through this.” Acknowledge their pain and validate their experience.
“I’m here for you if you want to talk or need help.” Offer your presence without forcing them to open up.
“How can I support you right now?” Allow them to express what they need instead of assuming.
“It’s okay to feel overwhelmed.” Reassure them that their emotions are valid and normal.
What Not to Say
“At least you’re safe.” While well-intentioned, this can minimize their loss and struggles.
“Everything happens for a reason.” Avoid offering platitudes that may come across as dismissive.
“I know exactly how you feel.” Unless you’ve experienced a similar trauma, this can feel invalidating.
“You’ll be fine soon.” Recovery takes time, and it’s important not to rush their healing process.
What to Do
Listen Without Judging: Let them share their thoughts and emotions at their own pace.
Offer Tangible Help: Ask specific questions like, “Can I bring you groceries?” or “Would it help if I took care of [specific task]?”
Check In Regularly: A quick text or call saying, “Thinking of you,” reminds them they’re not alone.
Help Connect Them to Resources: Share information about support services like shelters, counseling, or disaster relief funds.
Respect Their Space: Some people need time alone to process. Honor their boundaries.
What Not to Do
Don’t Force Positivity: Avoid phrases like, “Look on the bright side.” Grief and loss deserve acknowledgment.
Don’t Pry: If they don’t want to talk about the details, respect their choice.
Don’t Compare: Everyone’s experience is unique. Avoid saying, “It could’ve been worse,” or comparing their loss to someone else’s.
Don’t Offer Unsolicited Advice: Focus on listening instead of solving their problems unless they explicitly ask for help.
Long-Term Support
Recovering from a disaster is a long journey. Check in weeks or months later, when the initial wave of support may have faded. Encourage them to seek professional help if needed and remind them that there’s no timeline for healing.
Final Thoughts
Navigating life after a disaster is overwhelming, and your empathy and care can make a lasting impact. Be patient, be present, and remember—your support, even in small ways, matters deeply.
If you or someone you know needs additional support, resources like the California Disaster Distress Helpline (1-800-985-5990) or local counseling services are available to help.
Let’s come together to rebuild and heal. Your compassion can make a difference.
